Some good Love Dares the last few days.

Day 23: Remove anything that is hindering your relationship, stealing your affections, and turning your heart away from your spouse.

Day 24: Identify every object of lust in your life and remove it.

Day 25: Is there anything you haven't forgiven in your spouse, forgive today.

Now, the first one or two you might thing porn or another person like an affair or something like that, but if you think about it, there are other things in your life that might do the same. Such as reading a book. Do you read more than talk to your spouse? What about going out with friends? Or constantly picking up every little thing that falls on the floor or dirt you see, or do you watch too much TV? On the computer too much? There are so many things that can hinder or steal your affections... even an animal! You think of lust as a body thing; you lust after the flesh of another. Actually lust is:

LUST, n.

1. Longing desire; eagerness to possess or enjoy; as the lust of gain.

My lust shall be satisfied upon them. Ex. 15.

2. Concupiscence; carnal appetite; unlawful desire of carnal pleasure. Romans 1. 2Peter 2.

3. Evil propensity; depraved affections and desires. James 1. Ps. 81.

4. Vigor; active power. [Not used.]

LUST, v.i.

1. To desire eagerly; to long; with after.

Thou mayest kill and eat flesh in all thy gates, whatsoever thy soul lusteth after. Deut. 12.

2. To have carnal desire; to desire eagerly the gratification of carnal appetite.

Lust not after her beauty in thy heart. Prov. 6.

Whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her,hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. Matt. 5.

3. To have irregular or inordinate desires.

The spirit that dwelleth in us lusteth to envy. James 4.

Lust not after evil things as they also lusted. 1Cor. 10.

4. To list; to like.

So you can see lust is not just a bodily lust but can be lusting after other things as well. A vacation, a new car, new outfit, or anything that you crave or want that would hurt your relationship with your spouse.

Let's say you want a new car. You want it so bad you drive by the car lot purposely to make sure it is still there. Your spouse knows you want it and probably would love to give it to you but it is not possible. You constantly talk about it or mention it to friends and family. How do you think that would make your spouse feel? Knowing they cannot give that to you would probably make them feel bad. Maybe even make them feel like they are inadequate and can't meet your needs, even though it isn't a need. They may think my spouse needs this to be happy. Then they feel your happiness is based on that and not them. You aren't lusting after your spouse but things.

Yes, I know it can mean other persons or bodies and dirty magazines and movies and what not. I do know that, but I think it can also mean things in our life that we can live without even though we don't think we can. Does that make sense?

Now, day 25: Is there anything you haven't forgiven in your spouse, forgive today. That is a good one too.

John and I fight but I usually just walk away. I am made as a hornet for awhile, but usually let it go and we are done. Sometimes if we don't talk it out, that will creep back into my mind and next time we fight, guess what... That is right there. I think actually telling your spouse you forgive is important. If you don't, it will constantly creep back up and will ruin your relationship. If he does ask for forgiveness, give it to him, but if he doesn't... You still need to forgive him. It will take the help of the Lord at times but you do need to forgive them. That is when it is hardest when they don't apologize and let it go.

A lot of food for thought these last few days. It has been hard to swallow.

***Side note: I got the definitions for lust from the Webester's 1828 dictionary online at http://1828.mshaffer.com/d/search/word,lust